In this section is where we share our stories of adapting, believing and maybe moving on.
We all go through life trying to please everyone ( that’s what women do) deciding on whether to turn left or right, or staying where we are.
” Should I stay or should I go ” – The Clash 2012
The hardest part is making that decision, but once you have made it, you will find that’ what’s around the corner isn’t quite so scary.
This is my journey on moving on, I hope in some small way it helps you. Please do send in your stories as they will definitely help give some comfort to someone who maybe also needs some courage and guidance along their journey,
The date was 14 Feb 2010, time 14.05 – he told me he’s had an affair.
I know that date and time it is etched in my mind.
First thoughts were WHAT….
Who with bearing in mind he was working on an island in the middle of the Indian Ocean. Turns out to be with the purchasing manager.
I said he had to make his mind up with who he wanted to be with her or me his wife of over 20 years.
I should of known then that things would never be the same again. But I loved him and for better for worse, richer and poorer, unfortunaltly he fell foul on forseeking all others, I said i would support him and we would get through this.
Move on a couple of years, we were not getting on. All emotion and affection from him had gone. I lost weight, tried to be the person he wanted but I knew deep done I had to move on. I wasn’t happy.
Slight issue, I was living overseas at the time, had given up my career twice for him, was out of the work scene and most importantly I had a horse. Who was my rock and was the love of my life.
So what do I do? I had always enjoyed keeping fit and in a light bulb moment I thought I’ll become a personal trainer for women over 50 going through the menopause, getting over cancer and generally wanting to help women feel more positive about themselves from the inside out.
The next stage was to arrange for my horse to come back to the UK with me. This was far more important then any furniture or belongings.
So first was to get his passport, then the jabs he needed before going into quarantine.
In the meantime I had booked to go on to a personal trainers course, a week after I arrived back.
With books galore on the human anatomy I started my course. I am not going to lie, it was hard. Having to learn about things again and using my brain, took time. But to cut a long story short I passed and got a job at a UK wide gym chain. Which gave me a spring in my step again.
My horse arrived from his journey from half way around the globe, when he clip clopped out of the horse box, I cried feeling a huge sense of relief, happiness and love knowing that things were now going to be ok.
And they were, as a personal trainer I took up teaching spin. At the time I sweated a lot at the end of each class was a pool of water. Looking back it was a combination of serious exercise and hot flushes for sure.
A lot has happened since 2010, I’ve moved a few times overseas and back again. Have had some interesting jobs and dated some interesting men!!
It hasn’t always been a bed of roses, there have been dark times, I have cried a river, I have doubted myself. But deep down I knew that the sunshine would reappear again – and it did.
I’m now living in the most beautiful place surrounded by mountains and lakes. Unfortunately my beautiful horse passed a couple of years ago, but how lucky and honoured was I to have had him in my life. He was a rescue horse, but in the end he rescued me.
I have found my Shangri-la, the happiness I have is from within me. I will always be ok as I have Sarah, remember you have you and that’s all you need. I have let my baggage of rocks go, I am so content and I have roared at times very load that I can promise you,
In fact all is really really good around the corner.
Sarah – 62 – Scotland